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Monday, August 29, 2011

A sad reminder!

Today started off COMPLETELY normal...
at least I thought it did...  you know, woke up, noticed the sun trying to shine thru the window...  :)  turned on the news, listened to the day's stories, FINALLY got out of bed into the shower and started to get ready for work...  DECIDED it would be a good idea to send a few "good morning" txts...  ;)  Why NOT??  it didn't cost me anything, and sometimes that's ALL I need to get MY day started on the right foot!  ;) finished getting ready, went downstairs, chatted with my parents while my cup of coffee ""brewed," said good bye and I LOVE YOU!  and left...  I was on my way!!!

As soon as I got to work I realized that today would NOT be a NORMAL day!!!  It would be a day that would FOREVER change the lives of MANY people...  a few who are a big part of my daily life... 

One of my co-workers lost his son today...  I walked into work and noticed someone else doing "his" job...  I immediatly got a sinking feeling in my stomach...  OH NO!  I thought, his father in law passed...  made me sad...  BUT they've sorta been expecting it, "father in law" has been sick...  We've talked about it/him, I ask about him a lot, I don't really know why, maybe it's because whenever someone close to me has been sick, I have found comfort in people showing a little bit of care?? It helps to talk about things... I thought he's in a better place, and not in any more pain...  amazing how many things can go thru one's head in such a short period of time...  I finally got within a place where I could ask what had happened and the answer was NOT what I was expecting...

A son??  wait...  he wasn't ready for this..  he wasn't prepared for this..  that's what crossed my mind..  BUT WAIT..  then I heard they had a little hope...  ummmm...  ok, I left, clocked in, and inquired some more...  I have friends who are friends with one of the brothers...  So I asked, I learned there was little to no hope...  SUCH SAD NEWS!  :(  all day, I thought, it's not fair, they weren't ready for this, not prepared...  I thought of his dad...  he's a great person, his brother, one of the nicest people I've met...  his mom, the rest of the family....  and his friends... what are they thinking?  how are they feeling??

 I've been there...  I've been the "friend", it sucks, I wouldn't wish that on anyone...  I found out this afternoon that the "hope" they had held on to was gone..  he was gone... again so sad...  Carlie asked, I don't know what to do?  what do I say?  My answer is, there is nothing you can do, but be there...  be there when they reach out for help...  reach out to them...  the death of a loved one is hard to understand...  especially when they're young, when they're our age....

It's days like today when I remember that I've been on the other side of the coin too...  I've been the "sibling" I've lost a sibling, I've lost 2... I was young, but I remember that day, sometimes too vividly, I remember ALL the people, and the sadness, and the emptiness, I remember the service, and how I felt... My parents have been there, how easy it is to forget...  I am reminded once a year for sure...  sometimes twice...  on the birthday and the anniversary...  I don't know the exact days, I don't dare ask, but I can tell..  my parents get sad, and quiet, lost in the "memories"... I've never thought about writing down the dates...  maybe that's something I should do??

I came home and told my mom about Mike today, she got teary eyed and told me...  That is the worst feeling, she said NO ONE should ever have to deal with that...  then she told me that it doesn't get easier...  it's been almost 25 years, since my little brother died, I remember him, so full of life, there are still pictures of him hanging around..  she still remembers, she misses him terribly..  and so do I... She said she can't believe so much time has gone by.. I used to wonder what would of happened if...  I don't do that anymore... 

So today as I sit here and think of how unfair life can be sometimes, I will say a special prayer for Mike, and his family, the one's left behind, because what awaits them will not be easy.... and for his son...  May he rest in Peace today and always...
and for his son's friends....

And tomorrow I will make sure to remember to hug my loved one's a little tighter, and I will remember to make it a point to let all those important people in my life know how much they're loved, and appreciated...  :)

God speed Joe, and tell my little brother and sister hello for me... :)

3 comments:

C@r!ie said...

great post maria. I am still so at a loss. my heart is breaking for my friend :( if I haven't told you lately, I love you and cherish! I am so blessed to have such a great friend. xoxo

Kati said...

I am so sorry Maria. :( I also didn't know about your little brother and sister. :( I am so so sorry. There really aren't words to make someone feel better in a situation like this. :( I will pray for the family. :(

maria said...

@Carlie, I know I woke up this morning still not believing it... and still feeling so terribly bad for Mikey and Mike, and the whole rest of the family and all of joe's friend's and all of the family's friends... the list goes on and on... BUT I do have to say that I am relieved that everyone seems to have jumped on the "help a friend/s" wagon... Death is such a hard thing, but it also does amazing things like getting people together to take care of some of their own!! ;) Love ya girlie... I know I don't tell you enough... and I'm still here if there is anything else I can do.. tell Mikey for me!!! ;) see ya next week, I only wish it wasn't gonna be for this reason!! :(
@Katie, thanks... I don't think many people know... it's not something I've ever openly shared... ;) not really a good conversation starter... haha!! but yesterday made me sad for my "friend", I see the guy 5 days a week, and he's actually one I talk to, 5 days a week... he's part of my daily work family... I was heartbroken when I heard the news... and well it kinda hit closer to home than I would of wanted it too!!! ;) thanks... Prayers work wonders, and the family definitely needs all of the prayers they can get.. suddenly losing a child, a sibling, a friend, is one of the hardest losses anyone can endure... the future's gonna be a tough one!! :)