For some moments in life, there are no words....

Death leaves a heartache no one can heal, love leaves a memory no one can steal."

How do I begin a post dedicated to the man who allowed me to call him grandpa for 22 years?? The man who showed my family unconditional love for so long?? The man who DEFINED unconditional love?? The man who took my parents, and their kids in with open arms when we first came to this "unfamiliar" country that we now lovingly call home?? My grandpa was one of the most wonderful, selfless, loving, noble men I've ever known.....

Grandpa already had grandkids of his own.... my cousins, but he took 3 more in.... he refered to us as his grandkids, and he was grandpa to us... he was always proud of all that we accomplished, I remember how he taught us english when we first came here, and I remember how he always reminded me that spelling was important.... He was a teacher you see... :) I remember as a teenager how everytime i came over he "allowed" me to enter all of his grades into his book.... I so looked forward to it too.... It was my "priviledge" he'd say, but now I see that it was also VERY helpful to him!! :)

I also remember how proud he was of everything I accomplished, and he eagerly awaited hearing about all my adventures, he was always excited to hear what I was going to be up to next.... and I will never forget how excited he would get whenever I'd get home from a "vacation"... I also remember how "dissapointed" he was when after the Australia fiasco I said I was going to take a brake from traveling.... I'm almost POSITIVE that aside from my parents and my sister he was the only one that ever looked thru the whole "vacation" picture books cover to cover.... He was overly excited and proud when I finally made it to Europe.... and he waited eagerly for the "picture" book... :) and I know in my heart that even thought he wasn't really with us these last few days he heard me tell him all about my latest trip to New York, and I'm almost positive that he will be waiting for the "picture" book, so I better get a move on it! ;)

He was also my dance partner at weddings.... he always made sure that I got at least one dance... that's one of the things I will miss the most, that is one of the things that I have missed... I ran across this picture today..... it was the last one I took of us before he got really sick and couldn't remember us anymore.... Alzheimers is an awful disease... :( We were at a birthday party and we were dancing, this time I asked him to dance and I remember he was super excited, we both were.... This is definitly one of my favorite pictures.... I remember we had a great time.... and the picture shows it!! :) I will also miss the big bear hugs that grandpa gave..... and how his face lit up everytime he greeted you with a "como estas voz"??? ;) How are you?? And I will miss hearing the story of how he killed an elephant in indonesia as a young adult.... the elephants tusks sit proudly at my uncle's house these days.... I must of heard that story a thousand times, and it never got old.... and how while having a conversation with him you'd get at least 2 different languages if not 3, it always kept us on our toes!! ;)

Although we've known for a few weeks that the end was near.... hearing this morning that it had finally come was not easy... I'm not sure how I felt, I don't think I really felt anything initially, I was numb for most of the day....I told one friend, and 2 or 3 co-workers.... I think that's all I could handle... :) after work we drove out to Seal Beach, and the drive home was a quiet one, I think that's when it hit me, when the memories started rushing in, as I drove, tears kept filling my eyes.... Funny how neither my parents or I said anything at all the whole way home.... we were all consumed with our own thoughts, and memories of Ed.

Tio Edu, you will be in our hearts forever, thank you for all the memories, and unconditional love, and for allowing me to call you grandpa for nearly all of my life, I truly did feel like one of the "grandkids".... I know it was your time to go and although it hurts me terribly that you are gone, I know you're in a much better place, one without hurt and worry, and that gives me peace.... I know you'll be watching over us from up above.... Until I see you again..... I LOVE you grandpa!!!