......An ANSWERED Prayer, and a possible answer to the MILLION dollar question! ;)
Have you ever had a moment in which EVERYTHING suddently fit into place? and sorta made sense? For a year and a half I have been trying to find the "answer," not for me, or for the people close to me, but for the rest of the population, the rest of the people who find it necessary to ask hard questions, the one's who have tried to "figure me out" for whatever reason! The one's who ask me if I'm happy, the one's who wonder how it is that I really could be?? The one's who may think I'm headed for the wrong path, only because it's different than the path they're on!
My friend DeBran planned a lovely evening with Aunt Ruthie from sugarpiefarmhouse. This lady was seriously a God send to me.... we had the most amazing conversation, we talked into WAAAYYY into the night... she gave us wonderful advice, (which of course has to be taken and applied to each of us differently, The girls were asking parenting and marriage advice, neither applied to me, BUT her advice pretty much made sense in any situation.) So I listened and applied what she said to MY life.... The most important thing I remember she said was, that we needed to "live in the moment." so true, and something that I have ALWAYS strived to do... Enjoy today, because I am not guaranteed tomorrow!
The part that REALLY, REALLY got me though was towards the end, when she said she had brought us a little something.... It was a beautiful hanmade set of clothespins with words on them.... VERY IMPORTANT WORDS TO LIVE BY, SHE SAID! and with that she explained what it meant....
Be FAITHFUL to our LORD ALWAYS, Be THANKFUL, ALWAYS, and for everything, no matter how small, because as soon as we stop being thankful we lose our JOY, and when we lose our JOY, we start to become angry and bitter, and that keeps us from being "joyful," and we need "joyfullness" to have a happy home and lead a happy life!" Aunt Ruthie, sure is wise! ;)
So there right befoe my eyes was the answer to the million dollar question, I feel like I can now answer people when they ask me if I truly am happy....
ABSOLUTELY! I am completely FAITHFUL to the fact that God has a plan for me, I'm not sure what the plan is, and who am I really to question him? In the Bible he tells us to trust him, and that he will show us the path.... so trust is what I do, we all have a purpose, and I think I'm living mine! ;)
Do I question the fact that I am different than everyone around me, that I'm moving along a different path?? ABSOLUTELY, but not enough for it to matter... I would LOVE to one day have a family, but it may not be in the cards... who knows... and truthfully I'm ok with that.... I have come to terms with the fact that my "purpose" may be different! I became the happiest, when I did that years ago....
I am THANKFUL everyday for the gifts that come my way... I was given a GREAT family, TERRIFIC friends, and the most WONDERFUL little people friends that I could of ever asked for.... They truly are my JOY!
There are NO words to explain the JOY I feel when I see the excitement in Ella and Luke when they see me, Mr. Owen and Miss Layla's smile's melt my heart... and then there is Mr. Brody and Mr. Jakey Boy, and how EVERYTIME I walk in their house they run up to me and each take a leg to hug.... and Miss Kaelyn the other day was so excited to see me... I LOVED it... I can always use one more fan! ;) Then there are the girls Vides and Lucciana, I'm making a turnaround trip to see them this weekend, and they're beyond excited.... and then they will be on their way down for the summer, just to hang out and spend quality time with ME! My summer has almost all already been planned.... I see D-land dates with my "mini me" ;) and LOTS and LOTS of pool days! ;) How could I deny the JOY's that come to me in my everyday life, and question the fact that MY joy's are different that everyone else's?? That would be silly, wouldn't it? and I can't leave out the friends, our talks, errand running and just plain hanging out! ;) impromptu dinners, last minute pedi's and beach gettaways, girl talk into the night, really? I consider myself lucky, and I give thanks everyday... I am lucky that such GREAT things surround me!
Someone mentioned once that I was always happy... why is that? You're single, wouldn't you LOVE to be married? to have kids? you'd be happier if you did? Of course I would, BUT it's not what I'm supposed to "have" right now! I NEVER have an answer for these statements, and I'm not ALWAYS happy.... but I sure do try... after an evening with Aunt Ruthie though, I realized that I am happy because I have learned to trust in God, I decided a long time ago that I would let him lead me, I would let him show me the way, and show the way he has... so far it's been wonderful, granted I'm sure I'm missing out on something GREAT, what with marriage and children and stuff... BUT I seriously feel like I have the best of both worlds right now... I basically get to do whatever I want, when I want, and still get my fill with the kids... ;) someday maybe if it's in the cards it will be my turn! ;)
Thank you Aunt Ruthie for helping me see the light, for putting the "words/answers" to my million dollar question on the table for me.... :) and most importantly THANK YOU to those friends who let me have my "fill" of everyday JOY!!! ;) and with that I will STOP searching for the right answer, and continue to live in the moment.... ;) Because this moment is all I may have! :)